How to let go of the past and embrace future

 

How to Let Go of the Past and Embrace Your Future

Letting go is challenging, but can be a great change for your well-being.

We have a natural tendency to dwell on the past. After all, our experiences and decisions—including the good and the not-so-pretty situations. Ultimately help inform who we are today and can have a lasting impact on our world. As important as past experiences are, though, they don’t have to define us or hold us back in our present lives or our future. 

Learning how to unchain yourself from past traumas or regrets is one of the most freeing things you can do for yourself. Not only does it release you from stifling guilt or paralyzing fears, but it sets you up to jump into a future that’s exciting and fulfilling. I know from my own experience. 

I studied why we tend to dwell on the past, why letting go is so important, and actionable steps you can take to move forward and foster personal growth. 

Why Letting Go Is Important  

It’s easier said than done, but letting go of the past and fully stepping into the future can benefit you and your relationships from every direction.

It’s so important to let go of previous regrets and burdens because [not doing so] keeps us stuck in the past and robs us from living in the present.

This also means forgiving yourself and practicing self-compassion. This may be even more difficult than forgiving others, particularly if you struggle with feeling worthy or deserving.

However, studies have shown including my experiences I've shared with you, that doing the work to forgive ourselves has a positive effect on our well-being by helping us become more positive and reducing depressive feelings.

Step 3: Focus on the Present 

Mindfully focusing on the present can boost feelings of happiness and put you in the driver’s seat of your thoughts and emotions, taking a page from Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) here and familiarizing yourself with the “Three States of Mind.” Or you can use cbt  known as cognitive behavioural therapy.

This helps describe a person’s thoughts and behaviors based on emotional, reasonable, and wisdom minds. Emotion and logic are of equal importance and come together to form Wise Mind. “The idea of ‘wise mind’ is for the consideration of accessing emotions at the same time as considering your logical and rational factors. Wise mind is considered the optimal state of mind for decision making.”

That the more we practice mindfulness, the easier it becomes to access that ‘wise mind.’ Regular meditation, as well as redirecting our thoughts back to the present when things start spiraling, can help us remain more present. In regard to rumination of negative thoughts, studies have demonstrated that mindfulness can help prevent people from dwelling on negative thoughts.

Step 4: Embrace Change 

The reality of the world is that it doesn’t follow a straight path. It’s often full of twists and turns, and our ability to adapt to these changes can help us in the long-term. This is challenging for a lot of people because our brains naturally gravitate toward routine and familiarity (even if it’s negative).

Embracing the present through change allows us to dismantle what may have had us stuck in thoughts, behaviors, or patterns that no longer serve us, or keep us rooted in the past we cannot change.

Be open and accepting of mistakes or trauma and begin to be open to changing perspective and behaviours.

Step 5: Seek Support 

There’s so much to gain anytime you can lean on another’s shoulder. This step can take on many iterations, ranging from speaking with a trusted friend to seeing a therapist to attending group support sessions.

This step is so imperative because we are social creatures, and definitely need our village around us, Seeking support from others on our journey of letting go is a significant key to our success in being able to let go.

Additional Tips for Emotional Healing 

Let the above guide on learning how to let go of the past serve as your guideposts. You may waver and bounce between the steps, but the goal is ultimately to practice acceptance, forgive, live in the present, embrace change, and lean on others along the way.

I say that seeing this person as a “suffering human” or complex figure (versus pure villain) can help you view them through a kinder and more empathetic lens, which helps in forgiveness.

Draw Boundaries Where Necessary 

While accepting others’ imperfections can help us see them in a more forgiving light, some scenarios require us to create firm boundaries that help protect our emotional well-being.

When a person remains unchanged and continues to re-open past wounds—hurting us or draining us in the process—this is a sign that we should be more deliberate and self-protective in the way we communicate or interact with them.

as a life coach I'm here to support you on your journey.

Use Daily Affirmations 

A repeated mantra can help rewire your brain to let go of the past and look to the future. Some mantras that Lori uses with her clients include: “I will no longer allow my anger about this control and define me;” “I have the strength to let go and I choose peace to radiate within me;” “I embrace the present moment as the past no longer has to define me.”

Learning how to let go of past wounds, regrets, and experiences is a skill that we must learn and practice. Even initiating the process can have great benefits, such as decreased suffering and improved relationships. Over time, we’ll become better at accepting the past and the world around us, find more forgiveness and peace, and live a fulfilling life that looks to the present and future.

Want more? Read this one 👇

https://tranquilitynz.blogspot.com/2024/05/how-to-cope-with-change.html