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Showing posts with the label Relationships

You are responsible for your relationships

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Since relationships are normally two-sided, you can be responsible only for your part. But relating to someone else also brings a merging, so it is not easy to separate out what was. A leader follows one general rule that is when things are going well, praise the other person; when things are not going well be responsible for changing them. If you wait for another person to change things, or themselves then you are fooling yourself. You might end up waiting a long time for the person to change, you must arrive at self-sufficiency which is the realization that you are enough don't be someone you are not. You never need another person to complete you. Once this truly sinks in, you will stop asking others to change in order for you to feel better. It's not their responsibility; it doesn't show how much they care, and no matter how they so call try you might end up feeling bad anyways. Some people can be narcissistic so be careful. You reverse the belief that relationships are...

Overcome negative past relationships

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Overcoming negative past relationships    the past my world was crashing down around me. And I asked myself how could I possibly live without them? What’s wrong with me? Am I going to be forever alone? These were the thoughts racing through my mind within the first five minutes after the breakup. I realized just how invested I was in this person and that I had to learn how to live on my own again.   After going on an emotional rampage for a few days, I took a much-needed self care Moment and finally I asked myself, “What’s next?” That’s when I decided negative thoughts and petty post-relationship moves weren’t going to consume me, I would  not  be one of those people that stalks their ex while eating too much ice cream. Here’s how I managed to get through a really rough breakup.  Accept that you can’t change your past Remember that your past is always there, but you can’t change it (unless you somehow have a Time Machine) Why dwell on something that’s fixed...

Overcome a breakup

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 Overcoming a breakup in a relationship  It may take time to fully process the end of a romantic relationship. Identifying what you want from a future relationship and acknowledging the importance of your past. One of the  key steps in helping you move forward. Most people would agree you generally can’t help who you fall in love with. But in some circumstances, you might wish that weren’t the case. Specially when you have come out of abusive relationship. Maybe you love someone who doesn’t feel the same way about you.  The longing that accompanies one-sided love can affect emotional well-being and cause a lot of discomfort. This is not a way to be either. I know from experience.  Or perhaps you love someone who continually demonstrates they don’t have your best interests at heart. Maybe you and a partner love each other intensely but have too many differences to sustain a lasting partnership. Regardless of the situation, love is a complicated emotion. And even ...

Is it time to let go of a relationship? Break up

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 Let go of a relationship  We need to see if it is time to let go of a relationship that is not serving us.  1. Abusive relationship  2. Unsatisfactory physically and emotionally (sexually) 3. Feel unhappy  Got to respect that the relationship has ended and let go with gratitude that it teach us a lesson which makes us a better person in the future. Embrace this journey. It may be emotional but you will get through it. Respect the other person with a positive attitude.  Here is a article I wrote about how to get through a breakup  https://tranquilitynz.blogspot.com/2024/06/how-to-let-go-of-past-and-embrace-future.html https://tranquilitynz.blogspot.com/2024/03/mending-broken-heart.html It won’t be easy but it will show you are a strong person in life.  Listen to this video 👇 I hope this helps you through a negative situation.

How to handle dating

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  Dating can be difficult and a challenging mission. Some men can be jerks but women can be just as bad.  So how do we deal with it?  We got to keep an eye out for those who just want to use you and be players those people are negative and don’t understand their behaviour is not healthy. You got to be careful and keep an eye out for these bad behaviours that people have when dating. It not fair for others when using them or testing many other people because you are afraid to be hurt. You got to just face your fears but don’t let them abuse your trust regardless. If someone is a narcissist and shows that behaviour don’t go there with them get out of the situation fast. You are worthy of so much more. Be mindful of what you are seeing when dating someone. There will be people who just want sex and that is not a good thing to do. If they don’t respect your values and boundaries then they are not worthy of your time. Regardless be honest with the person and if they respect yo...

The power of expectations in relationships

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  The Power of Expectations in Relationships Expecting failure makes failure more likely. KEY POINTS The way an event is viewed will affect your behavior and, in turn, alter the actual outcome. Bringing a positive attitude toward your love relationship is protective. Sharing your positive thoughts with your partner strengthens a mutual positive resolve. You've grown up in a household of drama between parents and  divorce , you are concerned that you will fall prey to relationship failure as well. It certainly can occur, but it is far from a foregone conclusion. While all of us are continually rehearsing our reactions to anticipated future events, how we think about what awaits us, particularly in regard to an issue that is central to us, such as our love life, strongly influences our lives. Hope spurs us on; hopelessness, the inability to anticipate satisfaction, creates despair and flirts with thoughts of failure. While discouragement can occur in any relationship, some of us...

Mending a broken heart 💔

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 Mending a broken heart https://www.deviantart.com We all go through a negative experience of relationships including friendships that fail. It not our fault that someone doesn’t want to acknowledge your feelings but rather not face their issues and dump on you. That is what you call a toxic relationship with friends or sexual relationships. This behaviour is not acceptable or appropriate. So how can we mend our hearts from being hurt by someone else?  1. Self kindness  2. Care for Yourself- do something kind  3. Talk positively towards yourself regardless of the negativity they bring. 4. Remind yourself it’s their problem not yours. 5. Have a good cry 😭  When they talk negatively about you or towards others it is toxic behaviour and it is not acceptable at all!  So walk away from those people who talk negatively towards you and bully you. You are stronger than them and they know it. You just need to remember you are a strong person regardless of the negat...

Toxic relationships how to get past them

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Toxic relationships how to get past them   A  healthy relationship, everything just kind of   works . Sure, you may disagree from time to time or come upon other bumps in the road. Still, you generally make decisions together, openly discuss any problems that arise, and genuinely enjoy each other’s company.   Toxic relationships are another story. In an unhealthy relationship, you may consistently feel drained or unhappy after spending time with your partner, according to relationship therapist  Jor-El Caraballo .  This may suggest that some things need to change.  Maybe the relationship no longer feels enjoyable, though you still love your partner. For some reason, you always seem to rub each other the wrong way or can’t seem to stop arguing over minor issues. You might even dread seeing them, instead of looking forward to it as you did in the past. Healing from toxic relationships by Stephanie Moulton Sarkis PhD  What are the signs of a tox...